On the playground you would dare me to fall back into your arms;
But always you caught me in the nick of time from all harms;
I thought we’d be friends forever; I felt so safe and secure
But then one somber day, I wasn’t quite as confident and sure.
I looked around and it seemed you had passed me on by
I asked myself many times what did I do; was it I?
Seemed you’d snatched that security blanket away from my midst;
But I knew not why I had been so eagerly dismissed.
I did not realize that you were really still there. . .
But in a different aspect, for which I was not yet aware.
I grew into puberty still needing you; I craved for your being;
I became angry, sad, confused; emotionally fleeting and bleeding.
Indeed, there were instances where you might come back to me once more
But, I could not allow your presence to once again steal my joy;
I ran away each time I felt you were close on my heals. . .
I turned cold and hid my feelings with false smiles and ideals.
Then one day in June on a warm beautiful spring day,
You looked into my eyes and melted the icy fears away;
I thought you were all I needed and I gave into you once more . . .
We were one and mighty; to the top of the heaven’s we’d soar!
Then one amber evening as we were flying I smiled and looked around
And to my astonishment and dismay, you were not to be found!
Low and behold I quickly fell hard, straight back to the ground
In my fear to loose gravity – I became imperiously bound . . .
To certainties; no more would I venture my heart and soul
I thought I knew the meaning of life; I held tight all control!
I didn’t realize that you had never really left me completely;
But only changed forms; although disguised ever so discreetly.
I didn’t know that you changed forms to teach me the lessons. . .
In life that I needed to receive all the blessings. . .
that I would partake and share in the bounties and adversities
Of living, loving and giving of myself through all actualities.
But one sweet December, during a cold winter’s snow
I looked out the window and what would you know?
I saw in the glistening of the snow drifts so wondrously clear,
The tracks of your being, forever so near!
I looked at the tracks of my life in that opulent snow,
and for the first time in my life, I learned to let go!
I realized that through all challenges, I always survived!
You had always been there in one form or another as I thrived!
Who is this Spirit that changes with time?
Disguised in familiarity and strangers; bad and good times . . .
I realized that no matter what happens, I will go on
Although family, friends, or circumstances decide to move on . . .
I knew that this Spirit resided in God’s Grace and Love for Self
With strength and endurance, in spite of all else . . . .
I knew that no matter, I could always revamp–readjust
I’d finally embraced you wholly, you are . . . . (Click below for Answer!)
The Spirit of Trust! ~By CordieB.
This poem was inspired by and written especially for In?SanityFound – I was so touched by two amazing posts that this talented, caring young women recently wrote on trust. Her words reminded me of how many of us develop a sense of distrust from childhood on up until we realize that through it all, we were made stronger and we learn to trust God and Self! You see, the key to trusting others is to first trust God and self. We must realize that no matter what happens in life; we will be ok! We will survive! We always have; have we not? Where there is a Will, there is a Way. Let go of those fears and trust; you may bleed, but bleeding hearts always heal!
Peace, Light and Love, CordieB.
Thanks A. for the inspiration!